NOW I Understand!

Greetings from South Texas. I decided to fly down and surprise my dad with a visit. He spends about 1-2 months in Mission, TX and 3-4 months in South Padre Island, TX. I came alone as airfare was relatively high and Jessa was out of vacation.

The surprise went great. Dad said it is his best Christmas ever, although that was not my intention. I just wanted to see their "Winter Texan" world.

The park where he has a lot in Mission is very serene and laid back. Lots of golf carts and shuffleboard. They play pool and Euchre (.25 limit) in the rec hall. By dark, everyone is tucked in. Laaaiiiiddd zzzzzzzzzzzzzz back. This pace would kill me even if I was retired I think.

Then we went to Mexico.

I found the Fountain of Youth. It is a bar so the fountain is a margarita machine (Happy hour, all year. 2-1 on margaritas and pina coladas). The place is in Progreso, Mexico, just 35 minutes from Mission.

NOW I understand where the inheritance goes. It goes to Progreso where for $33, three of us ate and drank massive quantities of booze.

The best part is that this is literally SENIOR FROG'S. Senior meaning "nobody under 50" for the most part. These seniors whoop it up like a bunch of spring breakers. They know every song the one man band plays, they know when to chant, when to yell "ARRIBA" and trill their tongues.

I had to laugh as they are all torqued up on booze and their families visiting for Christmas are all there. The kids (30-40 themselves) and grand kids are mortified at Grandma and Grandpa as they go through this ritual like a person imbibing for the first time in a bar.

We left there, loaded up on meds to bring home and headed to watering hole #2. "The Rose Garden" is a narrow alleyway. $1 for Mexican beers. So cheap you buy them for the guys that come to shine dad's scooter and the guy weaving bracelets for Ashlie and her friends too. Why should they be left out of the beer?

Off to the final stop where we'll get our maximum allotment of booze to bring back to the states. Captain Morgan - just $7. Ketel One Vodka, just $15. A deal today gives you 3 bottles of Jose Cuervo for $6 each. That is our max (one bottle per person) so we get that deal ***NO....I did not drink any te-kill-ya**

Now, this all sounds good but don't forget the begging children, crippled people on the street, stray animals and garbage everywhere. Bitch all you want about the US but I'll take her with her taxes and crappy president over the conditions south of the border any day!

Today we recuperated from our fun yesterday. Tomorrow, to SPI we go. I have heard stories of the bars frequented there and I have a feeling it was discovery #2 for Ponce deLeon. Better sign off and get my rest. Keeping up with the retirees is tough!